Dearest Friends and Family,
How are you doing? That intro reminds me of years ago when I’d handwrite letters to friends and ask the same question: How are you? The difference is, back then, people would actually write back with an answer.
I really do wonder how you are; I’m not just typing that for form and effect. I hope you’re calm, confident, and uncluttered.
I’m none of those things.
This week I asked God to jump through so many hoops and for so many favors that at 4:01 a.m. yesterday morning he told me he was fed up…You need to back off, start figuring things out on your own, stop asking for so much, suck it up, I help those who help themselves…remember…?”
It’s true; I’ve been a burden to God over this final week of wedding mayhem. My stress-meter needle is haywire and my prayers cry out ludicrously: Please Lord no rain on the 29th, if you can’t make that happen, a sprinkle or two is fine? Lord, please make the meat fork-cut tender? Oh, and if everyone’s shoes could be super comfortable that’d be great too…
There haven’t been too many planning surprises: dress selection, invitations, cake tasting, hiring a photographer, musicians, DJ, church details, menu planning, etc., — pretty much par for the course. The shockers have been intangibles:
Fear
Depression
Friendlessness
Marrying off a daughter is more daunting than I imagined. I wanted little girls ever since I can remember and I’m thrilled Savanna is getting married. But I’m also down that Savanna is getting married. My biggest dream for Sav was to find a wonderful man to love and be loved by. She found that man. And here I sit typing: I’m scared.
A friend of mine told me, “When stress strikes depression might too.”
The Sweeney/Garde “holding pattern” these final days arrived on the scene with first-class cabin pressure. We’re ready to land this baby and we recognize we’re blessed with the best but last-minute stress has snuck on board, and boy oh boy, do we want to touch down.
Pray, pray, pray, every single day!
Have you ever felt friendless even though you know you have friends because you just had lunch with one?
There’ve been rough roads over the years in cliquey Atlanta for me. At times I’ve been positive that not a single person here, or anywhere else, liked me. Some how an increase in last minute planning pressure brought back my buddy-less-blues days when I didn’t have a single friend for as long as the earth is wide. Or, so I thought.
If you’ve read a few of my blogs, you know I refer to God and bible quotes a lot. I love God and believe in his Word and promises with the whole of my heart. Without God as a near and dear friend, and my human friends too, I probably would have over-dosed on kale and coconut water or something.
God has been so good to me and my family that it’s humbling in and of itself. But, ya, most of the time he tells me to figure things out on my own. He’s there for [us] but that doesn’t mean we should sit idly by expecting him to do all the work.
Cheers to God by our sides if we seek him.
Thank you for reading!
Love, Shelley
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you ~ Deuteronomy 31:6.
I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world ~ John 16:33
But you belong to God, my children, and have defeated the false prophets, because the Spirit who is in you is more powerful than the spirit in those who belong to the world ~ John 4:4
Oh how I wish they didn’t have to grow up. Savanna’s soft head smelled like heaven’s air.